100% Responsibility

The world is as it is and it is only our inability to accept this truth that causes us to suffer. This is difficult to unravel because we never quite see the world as it is. By ‘world’ I mean everything that is. At the same time that we are observing the world we are usually already contaminating the evidence. That is we are adding a story or a meaning to what we observe. Based on this story or meaning we form conclusions regarding what we have observed and what we should do. By adding a story we have inadvertently distorted what it is that was originally observed. The ability to create a story came about as a survival mechanism so that we could communicate and cooperate with each other. A story can hold many meanings. A story can be factual and useful and we can have the simple intention of using our stories for that purpose, to be factual and useful. We can however use our stories and draw conclusions that are not factual and useful and serve no useful service to anyone. Anyone who commits a crime or tells a lie is clearly using some kind of negative story. Addictions and mental health problems such as depression must also be based on drawing wrong conclusions to a false story. It is important to understand that whatever story we construct we have to live. Any story with negative implications must result in us having to live that particular story. Simply put this means that if our conclusion about the world is that it is miserable and hopeless then that is exactly what it becomes. The world is as it is and there is no story or conclusion possible that could explain or describe it. There is power in our ability to create a story and we feel powerful when we do this. There is a sense of power in thinking we know what is happening regardless of whether our conclusions are right or wrong. This is why this problem is so difficult to correct. The power we feel in being able to create a story that gives us the impression that we are in control and ‘know’ what we are seeing or doing is addictive. When something is addictive it means that we want that something more than anything else. Wanting the power to control and ‘know’ means we do not want to lose this power which means there is a limit to what we want to ‘know’. We are responsible for every story we construct in the sense that we have to live that story. If the story constructed is ‘I am depressed and feel hopeless’ then we must take responsibility for that story. This means no excuses for why we feel the way we do. If you ask someone who is depressed why they feel depressed there is always a ‘because’ something is not the way it should be. This ‘because’ story is circular in that it always comes to the same conclusion that what we believe is correct. If we are able to stop using stories to confirm what we believe we may end up at the truth, which is that we have feelings that are continually changing in response to what we believe about the world. These feelings or physical sensations have no meaning we add meaning to them in order to control and ‘know’ what is going on even if that results in suffering. If we can accept 100% responsibility for what we believe and see that what we believe becomes the world we live in, that is the world we have created in our head that we are then required to live in. Further if we can accept 100% what we are physically feeling without adding any meaning whatsoever then we will see the truth that physical feelings have no meaning and that they come and go naturally. It is only in the story we create and add to our feelings that suffering can exist.

Meditation

Meditation can be said to be the recognition of everything being as it is, but nothing is being said here of what this means. It is when we try to give a meaning to what this is that all our problems arise. When we don’t give a meaning to ‘what is’ it can be seen that there is still the awareness and the fact of what is. We are trained from birth to give meaning to everything and while this has many practical and useful benefits it may also have consequences that are far from useful or practical.  The word for the consequences that are not useful or practical is ‘suffering’, adding a meaning to ‘what is’ that is not true causes all the suffering in the world. Fortunately there is a particular mechanism built in to us all that may help us discern exactly what is practical and useful and what is not. This mechanism is suffering itself, so long as we understand that suffering can only exist when we believe something that is not true. It is important to understand precisely what this word ‘suffering’ means. The word suffering seems to refer to something quite extreme but this is not what I mean by suffering. Although suffering can be extreme it can also be very subtle. It is in the more subtle aspects of suffering that we may learn how we may add meaning to our experience is such a way that suffering is the result. When the cause of suffering is clearly seen suffering can no longer exist. When the body experiences pain it is doing what it is designed to do. This is not suffering, suffering occurs when we add a meaning that is not true to any physical sensations of the body. The more subtle aspects of suffering are, boredom, irritation, frustration, impatience, uneasiness, envy, jealousy, guilt, regret and any aspect of desire where we believe that attaining our desire will cause us to be complete. This does not include eating or drinking or anything necessary to the natural health of the body. Meditation starts with the principle and the fact that everything is what it is and no meaning is given to what this is. With awareness we just notice the way it is. We notice that there are sounds that occur without meaning, there are the physical sensations of the body and again these occur without meaning. There are thoughts that arise up out of nowhere and for no reason. A thought that is not practical or useful has no reason to exist. All of the aspects of suffering above such as boredom or irritation all come with an equivalent subtle physical sensation. In noticing these sensations carefully we may begin to see the root of all suffering. Sensations occur but have no meaning unless we give them a meaning, and these sensations become suffering when the meaning we add is negative or untrue. Once we can identify that we have added a negative or untrue meaning to natural physical sensations it becomes inevitable that suffering will end. There are many possible ‘methods’ of meditation; all of these methods have a problem in that they all involve doing something in order to attain something. Many of these methods can be useful in that we may ‘attain’ the ability to be more focused or to be able to concentrate for extended periods of time, they may also be useful in helping to still the mind. The simplest form of meditation involves no method and no attempt to attain anything. A question can be asked that may make this meditation clearer. The question is what happens when we sit without meaning or purpose? This may appear to be another method but it is not as the natural state of the mind has no meaning or purpose; its natural state is still. If the minds natural state is stillness then all the thinking or movement of the mind is not natural. Doing nothing is the hardest thing of all because we seem convinced that without the ‘anchor’ of thinking we will cease to exist. What does cease to exist never existed in the first place and once we are free of this delusion we find what we really are and what we have always been. This truth of what we are has had many names throughout history such as Buddha mind, spirit, presence, the unborn, nirvana and pure consciousness. It is interesting to consider that every aspect of what we are except one is subject to change. All the other parts that are subject to change swamp the part of us that is not subject to change. Not subject to change can also be seen as invisible or undetectable. Something that is not subject to change has no discernable qualities and this is the reason why so few ever realise the pure consciousness that they really are. It is because we are swamped by all the things that are subject to change such as the mind, the body, the physical sensations of the body, the personality or the thoughts that run through the mind, that the part that is not subject to change is so difficult to detect. If we can clearly identify all the parts of our being that are subject to change are not what we really are then this process of elimination will result in all those parts being seen for what they really are. In other words when all that we are not is eliminated we are left with what we really are.

Meditation Retreat

Meditation Retreat

    with Ray Menezes

                                      Friday 22^nd of June – Sunday 24^th June  2012

                    

                             Aylesford Priory

                               The Friars

                                                 Aylesford, Kent, ME20 7BX

      

Consciousness does not move or change and so was not born and can never die. Consciousness embraces all that is yet does this without any volition at all. When we are in agreement with all that is we begin to approach the nature of consciousness itself. Consciousness itself does not need to be in agreement with anything - does the sky need to agree to its blueness to exist? In agreement or acceptance we approach the nature of consciousness. In disagreement or resistance we distance ourselves from our own nature of consciousness. Even in disagreement we have not moved a fraction from consciousness, for consciousness is what we are and it is not possible to move away from what we are.

A weekend of enquiry into our true nature, from periods of stillness (meditation) we will find that part of us that never changes. As we learn to be with this stillness we will also work together in the group to identify the part of us that gets in the way of this. This part will take the form of gentle discussion within the group as a whole. You will be free to take part in this discussion or to listen. The discussion is aimed at identifying the obstacles created by the ego to insure its own existence. The weekend will consist of alternating between these two parts of the process from stillness to group discussion.

In order to fully be what we are we must learn to identify clearly what we are not. As well as this core part of the process there will also be meditation walks (learning to apply stillness to motion or activity) Also there will be meditation walks within the grounds of Aylesford Priory.

Aylesford Priory was founded in 1242 and places like this have a long history of spiritual enquiry, prayer and meditation. Around the world I have found places with this kind of history and energy that can very helpful as an aid to our own enquiry and meditation.

The priory can supply vegetarian meals for those who require them (please let me know as soon as possible if you want vegetarian meals or if you have any other special dietary requirements).

Aylesford Priory

www.thefriars.org.uk/

A meditation retreat can be an important source of nourishment and replenishment and most importantly a time to get to know ourselves in the deepest possible way. It is my view that we are all beginners when it comes to this enquiry/meditation process - as to know anything in regard to who or what we are is to know too much.

                                                  
The cost of this retreat will be £195.  This is for the retreat, accommodation and all meals. Accommodation is in single or double rooms.


 A deposit of £50 is required to book a place and the balance to be paid by 20^th June. Please bring your own cushions, benches or blankets for meditation if required. For those who wish to meditate on a chair these will be available.

Phone 07957 934047 for more details or to book a place.

                    

                                   By Train

                      London Victoria to Maidstone East

                                    then taxi or No. 155 bus to The Friars

                                                  (Mon-Sat: no bus service after 6.00 pm.

                                                       Sundays and Public Holidays: no bus service) or

                                                      London Victoria to West Malling

                                                                  then taxi

                                                                  

                                                                  By Road

1. M20 Junction 6 then follow signs to Eccles and The Friars.

2. M2 Junction 3 then follow signs (towards Maidstone A229) to Eccles and The Friars   

                                                          (note: major roadworks presently at this junction)

Agreement in Consciousness

Consciousness does not move or change and so was not born and can never die. Consciousness embraces all that is yet does this without any volition at all. When we are in agreement with all that is we begin to approach the nature of consciousness itself. Consciousness itself does not need to be in agreement with anything - does the sky need to agree to its blueness to exist? In agreement or acceptance we approach the nature of consciousness. In disagreement or resistance we distance ourselves from our own nature of consciousness. Even in disagreement we have not moved a fraction from consciousness, for consciousness is what we are and it is not possible to move away from what we are. When we distance ourselves from consciousness we only imagine that this is so. Full agreement is the same as perfect peace and happiness - when what we are is finally realised. When our peace and happiness is dependent on external factors like money, power or anything else we desire, our peace and happiness will be artificial and very short lived. Money, power or anything else we may desire are only necessary so long as we imagine that these things are necessary in order to attain peace and happiness. What we are is already complete and is not dependent on any external factors.

In consciousness there is perfect peace, happiness, and intelligence yet even these only arise in consciousness. We can approach consciousness best when we are not distracted by the things that arise in consciousness. Because the whole universe arises in consciousness it is not surprising that we are distracted yet even the wonder and majesty of the universe pales before consciousness itself. Consciousness cannot know itself it can only ‘know’ that which arises in consciousness. Consciousness does not need to know itself so when ‘we’ are no longer distracted by that which arises in consciousness there is just consciousness that is itself complete.

Consciousness itself does not move yet embraces all movement.

Consciousness itself does not change yet embraces all change.

Consciousness itself does not live and cannot die yet embraces living and dying.

Consciousness itself knows nothing yet embraces all knowing.

Consciousness itself knows nothing of the ego yet without it there could be no ego.

Consciousness itself knows nothing of thought yet without it there could be no thought.

Consciousness itself knows nothing of feelings yet without it there could be no feelings.

Consciousness itself knows nothing of the body yet without it the body is just meat.

Consciousness itself knows nothing of the absolute yet without the absolute there could

be no consciousness or any of the things that consciousness embraces.

The Sheltering Sky

‘The sky hides the night behind it and shelters the people beneath from the horror that lies above.”  This line from Paul Bowles book ‘The Sheltering Sky’ could be translated as  ‘the ego hides reality behind it and shelters us from that which we imagine we cannot bear’. What is it that we imagine we cannot bear? Look into a mirror and who do you see? What is seen is usually a person, with all their memories, their likes and dislikes and their history and all of this and more is seen as the identity of the seer. This is like looking at a pure blue sky and not realising that what is actually seen is an illusion. There is no pure blue sky, like the blue of the ocean which disappears when we dip a glass into it and hold it up and see there is no trace of blue in the water. If we could dip a glass into the ego we would find that there is no trace of any identity or ego to be found. What is taken for the ego is only pure intelligent consciousness but dip a glass into this and it would emerge apparently empty. We are not enamoured of emptiness even though in this case what is seen as empty is in fact full. We prefer the blue of the sky and ocean to something that cannot be named or seen. Given the choice we will always choose the ego over consciousness, the apparent to that which is not apparent. The book ‘Captain Corelli’s Mandolin opens with a doctor removing a pea from the ear of a patient, the pea had been lodged there since childhood and as a result the old man had been partially deaf as well as in recurring pain for most of his life. Towards the end of the book this man asks the doctor if he could put the pea back in his ear. His reason for this is that he no longer has any excuse for not hearing what is expected from him by his wife. Without the ego there are no more excuses for what we do; we are confronted by the world as it is rather than the world as we wish it could be. In this world we choose nothing yet are responsibly for everything. It is not possible to choose, as it is not possible to be anything but what we are, if you doubt this watch Sam Harris’s ‘free will’ video on You Tube. As to being responsibly for everything this is simply a truthful statement of fact, whatever we do has a consequence whether we know it or see it or not. There is no way to escape this truth, not knowing the consequence of our actions in no way gives us immunity from the consequences of such actions. Like the man with the pea, we can hear better without the pea in our ear but may not like what we hear.

The Ego is Almost a Closed System

The ego is almost a closed system, thoughts tend to lead to other thoughts without resolution and as a result become circular. The reason the ego is ‘almost’ a closed system is because thoughts or beliefs that are untrue tend to cause us suffering. Suffering is a major clue that something is wrong and in particular that something is wrong with what we believe. It is always possible that a realisation could occur that would end this tyranny of the ego. For many hundreds of years there has been a debate within Buddhism concerning the gradual approach versus the possibility of instant realisation. It seems to me that in a way both are true and false at the same time. Realisation has always been gradual this is because I assume it is not possible to be born realised. This must be true for all teachers such as Buddha or Christ. Instantaneous realisation does occur but this is misleading because the moment before realisation it was not realised and therefore was not instantaneous. As to what realisation actually means it is not possible to say although it may be helpful if we can be clear about what it is not. Realisation will never be a construction of the ego; it will never involve beliefs of any kind. False beliefs are generally easier to spot but it is the beliefs that refer to things that seem to be true that are the most difficult to identify. These latter beliefs are very common among ‘spiritual teachers’ of all persuasions and their followers. They tend to sound very pleasing to the ear and to the ego. They are often about oneness and love and the light that shines within. All of these do point to things that are true but are nevertheless still beliefs and beliefs require a believer and the ego. It is very easy for the ego to appropriate anything from anywhere and espouse it as the truth. How can we know if what someone is saying is true or not? It is not possible to know - it is only possible to believe and a belief tells us nothing of the truth. It is not possible to be given this truth no matter how eloquent or wise the giver may be. If we want to be free we must look within and find for ourselves what is real and what is not. There are no shortcuts but there is the possibility of identifying what is of the ego and what is not. There is also the possibility of ‘realising’ that the physical sensations of the body are real but have no meaning. It is the meanings that the ego adds to these physical sensations that cause suffering. It is possible to switch our attention from what these physical sensations mean to what these physical sensations actually are. This is not easy because we have been assuming that the meanings we have added to these sensations for so long actually relate to something real. When we are able to be with the physical sensations of the body without adding meaning or resistance then the possibility arises of the ‘flip’ from ego to consciousness. 

Mindsets

Consciousness is connected to intention and intention can be considered to be what we want. At no time can we do something that we do not want to do. Everything we have ever done therefore must also be what we wanted to do. It is important to understand that what we intend or want is a perfect system that enables us to survive as well as the manner in which we survive. If our intention is not clear or complete then it is certain that problems and possibly suffering will arise. A complete intention occurs when we are in full agreement with what we want. This can be very subtle, how do we know if we are in full agreement with what we want? The surest way to check this is to look carefully at what we actually have. What you already have must be what you want. If there is any trace of suffering in what you have then this is the proof that you are not in full agreement with what you want. When we are in full agreement with what we want life becomes easy and effortless. All possible negatives are eliminated and this alone will improve our quality of life enormously. Without negatives our life will naturally find a direction. It is difficult to put a name to this direction but life begins to flow very easily and without effort and in a positive and healthy direction.

Incomplete mindsets involve not being in full agreement with what we want. If we were to program a computer with incomplete information then that computer could not do anything but follow this incomplete information and this in turn means that the computer could not possibly work efficiently. This is true for us, if our intention is incomplete then the information that is given to consciousness must also be incomplete and this must cause negative results.

Complete mindsets are always positive and never involve suffering. Simply put complete mindsets work. Here are some complete mindsets;

At no time will I believe something that is not true. At the root the only things that can be assumed to be true is that which is happening without any beliefs being attached. If we attach a negative meaning to what is happening then we must live through the unnecessary negative meaning and its consequences.

I will no longer accept ageing, tiredness, illness or depression or any other negative belief as all these are beliefs that cannot be true. The reason why these beliefs are not true is because they arise from the ego and the ego is not what we are, what we are is consciousness and none of these beliefs have any validity within consciousness; consciousness does not age, become tired, ill or depressed. Consciousness can never change except when the body dies and is always clear and complete.

I will from now on only learn from my experience regardless of what that experience turns out to be. Without negative beliefs we can only learn, it is not possible to  experience something that we cannot learn from. Learning is always positive or else it is not learning. 

I will never intentionally do anything to harm myself or anyone else. Being untruthful can be seen to be potentially harmful to oneself and others. Experiment with other possible mindsets and find out for yourself those that work and those that do not. 

The most subtle mindsets are those that connect to our feelings, our feelings are connected to physical sensation and as such they have no meaning. If we add a positive or negative meaning to physical sensation then we must live through the meaning we have added. Positive meanings can often be subtly connected to negative meanings and so are unnecessary. What the body feels is known but does not need to be held as a positive or negative belief.